I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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