Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i think my mom watched the whole time
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Panties = found
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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