Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I can't turn off my feet"
40s are totally the cure
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
