matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize