Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
time to smoke my breakfast
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
