Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
