Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
