There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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