I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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