Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
