He is such a slut. More and more my type.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
