Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize