I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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