farters have to be the big spoon...
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
