Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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