Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
