if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize