help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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