can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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