Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
