Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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