vagina is talking i cant
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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