did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize