Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
