This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
