garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
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