also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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