There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
