Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
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Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
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I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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