I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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