Already got asked if we're dating
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
