Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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