ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We're too hungover to prance.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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