When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
