she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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