what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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