I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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