nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
