i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
The struggles of a small town man whore
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I yelled at your uterus for you.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize