bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
