at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
i think i just lost a toe
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