ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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