theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
