have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
