"it" just moved
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
