You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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