idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
