you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
