Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
