I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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